Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Validation

Validation... every human being on the planet needs to feel that their life is important to someone, that they are worthy of being here, worthy of love and worthy of life.

This is especially important for young people in general, but I know for a fact that is vital for teen girls and young women. Not that we older women don't need to be validated occassionally, but we have acquired enough life lessons with wisdom and insight to see our own worth - most of the time.

The problem with validation...

We all heard about the young teen who committed suicide after becoming totally unvalidated and crushed by the comments of a supposedly young male teen, who actually was the mother of another teen girl in the same neighborhood. Apparently this woman needed to be validated to the point of wanting to be perceived as "cool" by her own daughter and her young peers that she threw caution to the wind, along with compassion and love, and inadvertently caused a child to hate herself enough to end her short life.

We can talk about God and love and how that's all the validation a Christian needs, but it's just words. Many young Christians have not yet experienced the supernatural presence of God and therefore cannot grab hold of that love and validation, especially when their home life is awful.

One of the reasons young girls need validation is that their Fathers left them. Mid-life crises and mistresses took precedence over fatherhood, leaving young girls who are searching for love and validation from males in all the wrong places and from all the wrong faces, which is a volatile and dangerous game.

Understanding the psychology of humankinds emotional needs can go a long way in helping us as Mothers, teachers, confidants and mentors to guide our young girls and help them learn how to feel and realize their own worth without craving the flattering lines sometimes cast upon them in sport as bait is cast into the water for fish.